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Helping Christians Not To Hate, And Why I'm No Good At Helping People

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Mar. 24th, 2010 | 03:01 am
music: Freaky Styley, by the Red Hot Chili Peppers

Hi Kathy and Nick,

I've been going through some more rough times with alcohol, but this time the bender wasn't too bad and the aftermath is leading to a lot of good things.

I'm examining my beliefs on the subject of God, as it is clear to me that my Atheism causes me pain.  I already knew that, in fact.  What's new is considering what to do about it.

Now don't get too far ahead.  I still can't really imagine how I could believe in the God of the Bible.  But I'm at least trying to look around a bit.  I'm going to be talking with an old college friend of mine who is a Jesuit priest about it.  I don't need debate from you, I need it from him.  Of course, love from you is always great.

I was looking at one of the things that Christians sometimes say that is hard for me to accept, and in doing so came to appreciate Jesus more than I did before.  So I thought I should share it with you.  Please don't think I'm attacking you, even if it turns out you think I'm wrong.  How you interpret Christianity is your business, as far as I'm concerned.  I'm just trying to help you love God more the way you want to.

The thing that always bothered me is the idea of hating the sin but loving the sinner.

Jesus never said this.  He said love your enemies and love your neighbors, don't judge people, forgive them.

If you hate the sin, you are hating and not loving.  It's just too hard to hate a sin and not slide into hatred for the sinner.  Let God worry about what is sin and focus on loving and forgiving.

I know that you are afraid Polly and Corrie will end up in Hell.  The idea hurts and scares you.  In your hurt, you start to hate their sins, because you fear their sins are the things that will take them away from God.  Do you really think God won't step in and save your wonderful daughters?  Don't have fear and hate, have love and forgiveness and hope.  Let God take care of both you and them.

I love both of you, and wish you well.  I'm getting better.



And you know what?  I did this out of arrogance, pride, anger, and desire for revenge.  And knowing that I'm really manic, which clouds my ability to do the right thing.  I love Kathy, but she is my most dire enemy.  I deliberately tried to change two other people for very selfish reasons.  Fuck 'em, just to see the look on their face.

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